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Winter dies, and snow remains. You follow the cloud-strewn paths,
as you have countless times before, beneath many moons, some full,
some shriveled. Often you rest at the stone shelter halfway up the
mountain, and regard the skeletons of trees through a gaping abyss
that was once a window. Night is fearful with cracking wind as you
crawl under the rotten cloth that serves as a blanket. At day, you
retrace your steps on the path, then press forward, then back, again
and again -- all a protracted stab at remembering. At various points
you do recollect, vaguely, your heart, drenched in red and very much
alive, as it fell from your chest, through your vainly grasping fingers,
and settled on perfect white snow. You
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watched as it lay there beating, and your breath could not come from
your chest, because now there was nothing at all there, nothing to
absorb and expel the air that clogged your throat, and it was like
being thirsty. And to your surprise, your heart continued to beat
for a time, there on the snow, and you observed as it finally came
to a stop. This has happened many times. And yet you return, you recall
the many places along this path where your heart has been ripped from
you, all of them unique in some way, you just know it, but the memories
flee. You just remember the heart, the red on snow, the feeling of
thirst. And you look up, at the clouds that soar like ships, at the
blue beyond, and hope.
It is a defense mechanism, this not remembering. When one catalogues
the taste of a simple drink
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